My So-Called Life

I've felt like a floorboard for so long now
And I'm a little bit more than just worn out
from all the times you walked back and forth
over me
Do you really think it's easy to support your weight
When you don't want to help repair the floor

Just cause I'm nice, doesn't give you the right
To make all of my decisions for me
I swear to god this is my so-called life
I don't want to live it under your sea

Dirt and dust keeps collecting over me
But there you are making me feel
Like a bird in the sky, finally free
Soaring above clouds, looking down
In your shirt I find comfort
In your bed naked again
I'm in heaven
I'm in heaven

you return my nice with your own brand of nice
You understand that this is my so called life
And for that I am happy

I think I like you more than I like anyone
And that's not a white lie it's a confession to god
I hope you don't mind me telling everyone
I'll scream it from the roof at the top of my lungs
Hey world I think I'm in love
I know I'm in love

I've felt like a floorboard for so long now
But now I'm looking up wishing to be
A tile in your roof, an umbrella for your heart
I'll protect you from the tears that you swear are just raindrops
Cause I just want to do my best to take care of you
I just want to do my best to take care of you

Teenage Angst, And A Lesson In Bad Metaphors

I'm an open book with torn up pages
A ghost in a shell in human form
I'm a broken heart in "I love yous"
I'm a washed up has been

Waiting for my time to come again
Waiting for my time to come again
I'm fishing for the answers of the end
I'm fishing for the answers of the end

I'm an artist who can't express
All the feelings that make me depressed
Like a seagull searching for the ocean
I just want to be free of all situations
Aimlessly I'm looking for the cure
To my lack of motivation

I just want to be free
I just want to be free
I'm tired of the struggle of being me
I'm tired of the struggle of being me

The ending is coming I'm hoping for death
It's sweet release and my final breath
Satiate the hunger within my chest
Love or death, please make your bets
I won't call it quits no no no

Waiting for my time to come again
Waiting for my time to come again
I'm fishing for the answers of the end
I'm fishing for the answers of the end

Ms. 9

It was a summer that I met your life
For the first time I deemed it love at first sight
When you woke up I witnessed your eyes
Bewildered with the thought of someone new
A kindred spirit you found in me
Hoping for lasting memories

And when it came time for us try
It fell apart with solemn eyes
I couldn't be there for you
When all you needed was comfort
A common theme throughout my life
A common failure throughout my life

Still friendship held onto us
Refused to let us go
Relied on one another
To make it through the night
We were each others light
Fighting the darkness inside ourselves

A year or so later
You and I tried again
This time deemed more fruitful
Yet again space kept us apart
Although you made it clear much later
That I was too easy and you
You wanted a challenge that I couldn't give you
A common theme throughout my life
A common failure throughout my life

But somehow throughout the fights
We're still friends
We're still friends
And once again
The cities that separate us
Hold themselves against us
I love mine, while you love yours
But I know that we can hold on to what we have
A lifelong friendship is worth this.

It was a summer that I met your life
I quickly deemed it love at first sight
A common theme throughout my life
A common failure throughout my life

Darkside

I blame myself for caring about you
You're a bitch but you already knew that
The only thing that I ever wanted was your happiness
And I'm glad to know
That all it ever earned me
Was an eternity
Of regret for ever being human in the first place

If you could read my mind
You'd be a suicide

And I
Have a darker past than you
So stop
Blaming all your problems
On what you've been through
The sympathy you gather
From all the boys you spin a round your finger
Doesn't justify
All choices that you've made
In the name of running away

Now darling we both know
That hate isn't really my thing
But I think it's what I'm feeling
How else could you explain
Me not caring if you died

Now I'm sick of your ways
And the sadness that you choose to radiate
Your manipulative gaze
Attracts boys like the plague
You would put a succubus to shame

And I
Have a darker past than you
So stop
Blaming all your problems
On what you've been through
The sympathy you gather
From all the boys you spin around your finger
Doesn't justify
all choices that you've made
In the name of running away

It's so sad to see
That the love that I had
Has been twisted into hate
I just wish you would understand
I was the light in your life
And now I'm leaving you to the dark
To hold you down and rip you apart

Live together, die alone

Woke up one day with a shadow on my back
Noticed silhouettes keeping me intact
No one should hold on to the past
If it means holding on to regret

Oh god please grant me the sweet relief of breath
I just need to get this off of my chest

Somehow I know Im destined to die alone
When love has turned my heart to stone

I can feel the devil on my back
Creeping up like a heart attack-attack-attack
He is the darkness inside my head
Telling me I am better off dead

Oh god won't you stand on my shoulder
Give me the strength to tear him asunder

Somehow I know I'm destined to die alone
I hope to be reunited with you soon

So tell me who wrote our play
Who wrote all the words I will say
Is is you or is it me
Who is the star of this story

Is it filled with cliches?
Will I die of a broken heart?
Was my life written out for me?
Do I have a choice?
What's my story?
Do I get to choose, who I fall in love with?
Do I have control of my own body?
Time will tell if I will be happy
Time will tell if I will sleep soundly
Time will tell
Time will tell
If we live together
And die alone

Sinking

I hate all the ship metaphors
That I create to anchor myself to
How much I have sank
Since I've set sailed from you

And I am looking for
Something to keep myself alive
And I realized
Despite my darkest thoughts
That I don't want to die

Now watching lightning crash down on all of my dreams
I'm looking for a way to see in between the lines
That have been drawn between you and me

And I am looking for
Something to keep myself alive
And I realized
Despite my darkest thoughts
That I don't want to die

There's no silver lining to be found under the sea of memories where I drowned
And there is no hope to be found in the skies of heaven from where I fell
And there is no fear to be found in the depths of hell where i belong
A skeleton of a man I have become waiting for the bugs to eat my bones

Young Again

Let's walk to the park when the sun is setting
Sit on the swings, pretend we're young again
and I know things changed
but I'd kind of like to see you again
Although I know
I can't let that happen

I would love to re-meet you
start over again
'cause my memory
refuses to let you back in

Let's walk to the river when the sun is rising
Sit on the edge, pretend we're in love again
And I know things changed
But Id kind of like that to stay the same
Although I know
That won't ever happen again

I would love to re-meet you
Start over again
'cause my memories
Refuse to let you back in

Times are tough
This ride is fucked
I don't think I'll ever be
Ripe for the taking
Cause I keep giving
My self away
To anyone who asks

I would love to re-meet you
Start over again
Cause im so tired
Of these memories of you

I would love to re-meet you
But I know how it would end
I would end up hating you
Just like how we turned out
The first time