Heads and Other Perversions

http://soundcloud.com/kevin-kelley/heads-and-other-perversions

I've taken off my head
More times then I can remember
It's not that I enjoy it
It just helps me fall asleep at night
I have so much trouble falling to sleep at night

And I've forgone drugs for depression
Why would I be high when I can be low
As close to the ground as i can be
Cause I know that I will be there one day
Underground I mean
That's why I sleep on my floor
I'm preparing for century's of boredom
Sleeping like a stiff
But as happy as a corpse

I don't even drink
But not because I don't approve
I just need to stay in control
Cause if I'm not then I'll make a mistake
And if I make a mistake
My world will end
And I completely believe that

I've taken off my head
More times then I can remember
It's not that I enjoy it
It just helps me fall asleep at night
I have so much trouble falling to sleep at night

I don't really approve of anything I do
But I'll do it anyway
Cause I no longer matter
The only things that really do
Have the names of my friends
That was hint it's my friends

I don't really approve of anything I do
But ill do it anyway
I don't really approve of anything I do
But I'll do it anyway
I don't really approve of anything I do
But I'll do it anyway
I don't really approve of anything I do
But I'll do it if it makes you happy
If it makes you smile
If it makes you cry
If it makes you feel at all
I just want you to feel in the vicinity of me

I've taken off my head
More times then I can remember
It's not that I enjoy it
It just helps me fall asleep at night
I have so much trouble falling to sleep at night
So I resort to taking off my head

Home

Sleeping in cars in the day
In parking lots near taco bell
When night falls they're lucky
We don't try to rob them
With our sadness as our weapons

And it's finally snowing here in Manchester
On the leap day of the leap year
I'll call it a miracle if you let me
But i'm just happy it's here

My house is a safe house
For all my friends and more
I let everyone in
Who needs a place to stay
As long as they respect the place

There's this girl here that I fancy
She wants to save the world
But she won't save herself first
And I don't know what I really feel
I think I just need something to heal

And it's finally snowing here in Manchester

On the leap day of the leap year

I'll call it a miracle if you let me

But i'm just happy it's here

Now i'm wondering what to do

Where to head with my life

I understand that i'm thinking a little to much about this

Adding to the burden on my shoulders

I might finally leave this town

But it's going to be hard

Cause all my memories reside here

And it's snowing here in Manchester Fucking New Hampshire

It's something that i'll always miss.

It's Not You, It's Him.

How long does it take you
To get to my house
I only live five fucking blocks away
We're on a god damn schedule
The mall closes in an hour
And I want the new Final Fantasy

It's too bad
That the nerd in me
Outbids the romantic
90 percent of the time
So I don't think you're getting roses tonight
But we could role play if you want too

I'm sorry honey
But i'm gonna play the mass effect demo
This valentines day
Because Commander Shepperd
Means so much more to me
Then you will ever be
And it's not that I don't love you
I just love him more.

So stop scolding me
For loving fantasy
More than reality
It's just that science-fiction
Is so much better than real life.

I mean how could you argue
When you've seen Keanu Reeves
Know kung-fu in The Matrix
There's just something about that guy
That makes me love everything
He's ever done
I wish he was my bestfriend

And i'm sorry honey
But i'm going to spend this valentines day
Playing Mass Effect 3
Commander Shepperd just means so much more to me
Then you will ever be.

603

This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I lost all my friend here
This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I broke my heart here
This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I lost my life here

I guess it comes with my age
I've spent my entire life here
Eating at the local diner
At two thirty in the morning
Drowning myself in coffee
To forget all my problems
Only to remember them
For the next five hours laying in bed
I can't sleep
I wonder why

This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I lost all my friend here
This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I broke my heart here
This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I lost my life here
I guess it comes with a sad face

You might remember that one time
That we sat at the water front
For six fucking hours
That's the last time we had a real talk
I mentioned how you were fucked either way
Then we laughed about it

This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I lost all my friend here
This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I broke my heart here
This is where good things go to die
And I remember when I lost my life here
I guess it comes with this place

small smiles

I
AM
LOSING ALL MY FRIENDS
THROUGH APATHY AND AGONY

There are no words
To describe how I can't talk to you anymore
Out loud the words
Just don't come out of my mouth
And digitally
They just don't have the same meaning
Its like I'm mute with you
but too dead to care

So lighten up your little smiles
I burdened them all away
Feelings will mean more without me
I'm taking myself away

The last important thing I ever said
Was about how I feel in head
About how I don't think we'll remain friends
I couldn't stay alive for more than six months
Before I cut myself again
I hope that one day this trend with stop
Cause its a burden to us all
Mixing metal and flesh

So lighten up your little smiles
I burdened them all away
Feelings will mean more without me
I'm taking myself away

Its funny how you've acted
Since I've stopped trying at this colloquial game
Not a word or a peep
Our friendship was nothing more
Then a crutch anyway
So let's stop limping
And walk away

So lighten up your little smiles
I burdened them all away
Feelings will mean more without me
I'm taking myself away
Ill find myself a way.

Contradictions

I understand who I am now
I'm arrogant
I'm selfish
I probably think I'm better than you
But I hate myself
I hate myself too

I'm adamant about being a waste of space
Because I was always told that I was great
Its the curse of being self aware
And hating every minute

But despite all the negative
All I want to do is help others
And then drop out of their lives
Cause I'm too much a burden
To have around for long

Cause I understand who I am now
I'm sad and reflective
I'm emphatic
I expierence life through everyone else
And I'm burnt out
So god dammed burned out...

I desire to be of some use to someone else
But I can't even help myself
Because I don't want too
I just want to exist
I want to live in monotony
It would be easier that way

But despite all the negative
All I want to do is help others
And then drop out of their lives
Cause I'm too much a burden
To have around for long

Cause I understand who I am now
A man of contradictions
A man of emotions
A man of everything he's not
A man of everything
That I am not

Figuratively Of Course.

I shape my fingers as a gun
Point and click at my right temple
Blow my brains out
Wish it happened
Right that second

Grab the knife
So obviously imaginary
Stake it through my heart
To end all of my vampire tendencies
Im done sucking blood
From all of my best friends

Silver bullet through my chest
Kill me while I am a beast
So I can't so unconsciously
Harm everything right next to me

Its morning again as I
I shape my fingers as a gun
Point and click at my right temple
Blow my brains out
Wish it happened
Right that fucking second

Crosses to hold me at bay
When I know what I'm doing is wrong
But I'm doing it anyway
And if I get too out of control
Grab an axe and behead me
As soon as you get a chance

And if I rise again
Promise me you'll kill me again
Cause its not safe for you
When I an alive

Its the second coming as I
I shape my fingers as a gun
Point and click at my right temple
Blow my brains out
Wish it happened
RIGHT THIS FUCKING SECOND

And if I rise again
Promise me you'll kill me again
And if I rise again
Promise me you'll kill me again
And if I rise again
Promise me you'll kill me again
AND IF I RISE AGAIN
PROMISE ME YOU'LL KILL ME AGAIN